Client A has been in SAY Women’s semi-supported accommodation for approximately 11 months. During this time, she has made significant progress despite having to face challenges. Her key worker has supported her to seek external support from specialist support services to help deal with her substance and alcohol use. At times she uses drugs and alcohol as a way to self-medicate to help cope with her trauma. She shows great insight into the reasons why she uses substances to help her cope.
Client A is also known to self-harm when feeling overwhelmed and stress levels are high. This can make her feel suicidal. When she recognises this is how she is beginning to feel, she is more inclined to come and speak with her key worker or other staff about how she is feeling. This is a positive step forward for her because previously she would isolate herself.
Throughout her time at SAY Women Client A was aware that there was a court case pending. This court case has now been to trial where the perpetrator was found guilty for sexually abusing her from the ages of 6 to 14 years old. This was extremely traumatic as the perpetrator is her brother. She gave a personal statement detailing how this abuse affected and continues to affect her in all areas of her life. With the support of her key worker she was able to detail the effect this has had on her and on her family as a whole. Throughout this Client A has shown great resolve as she believes discussing these issues is the right thing to do.
Client A’s mental state fluctuates, however she is willing to try different medications from her GP to cope with the symptoms of her ongoing depression and trauma. When she has good days, she presents as a smart, articulate, funny, caring and compassionate young woman. She is very artistic and expresses this in her ability to contribute to activities like art and fashion, and is always willing to help her peers.
The next step for Client A is to focus on routine and structure, working closely with her key worker and staff to establish the next step in her journey, looking ahead to where she would like to secure her own tenancy. This would include looking at facilities around the areas Client A could access i.e. education, support groups and leisure activities.
Client A has said: “The support I have received at SAY Women has saved my life. My dream is to secure a job that does the same for another young woman some day”.
Client B has been in SAY Women’s semi-supported accommodation for approximately 17 months. She was a victim of severe trauma and abuse when she first came to the service. She has made significant progress through her time in accommodation, which at times has been challenging as she has had to navigate her way through the criminal justice system as a witness against her perpetrator. She managed to do this with dignity and the support of SAY Women.
Client B has engaged well with her key worker and other staff. She has been honest about some of the challenges she has faced in the past with addiction and her own battle with her life situation. However she has been positive about what changes she needs to make to progress in life.
She engages in sessional activities, building on her self-esteem, confidence and her skill set. She also engages in her 1:1 practical and emotional sessions with her key worker to address any issues, but to focus more on the positive aspects of her life.
Client B had her own difficulty with the criminal justice system. However, she acknowledges and has accepted responsibility for her part in this and is actively addressing community service. All this is with the support of staff.
Over her time with SAY Women, Client B has demonstrated a willingness to understand more about her life situation, as well as acknowledging the importance of safeguarding for herself when out, as well as on social media.
The young woman has expressed gratitude for SAY Women’s support over her time in accommodation and will soon be ready to move onto her own tenancy with support from staff. She will receive outreach support after she leaves SAY’s accommodation until she feels settled in her new home.
Client B said: “There is nowhere else I could have seen myself being supported by staff, and I feel I have learned positive skills that I will take with me when I move into my own flat”
I was subjected to mental and physical abuse from family members after watching my mum die at just 6 years old. I was also sexually abused. The abuse started from the age of 6 until 16 when I was kicked out and made homeless. That was when I met my daughter’s father who also ended up being emotionally, physically and sexually abusive towards me. After 2 years I found the courage to leave him. I packed myself and my daughter a bag and left, this made us homeless. He managed to find us and make my life hell for 3 years. Being a young single mum and homeless was scary. I was so confused and scared, I thought I was the problem. I thought I was useless, stupid, fat, ugly, rubbish mum, crazy, and psychotic. I hated myself and struggled really badly with self-esteem and confidence. All I could think about was dying and how my daughter would be better off without me.
I was referred to SAY Women by Venture Scotland. At first I had no motivation whatsoever as I kept being let down by the NHS Mental Health team. After years of asking for help, I was just waiting to be let down again. I knew I needed it, so I gave it a go hoping I would finally get help.
At SAY Women I focused on counselling where I learnt about Grounding Techniques, Positive Thought Trains, Positive Reinforcement, Unhelpful Thinking Styles and Unhelpful Language, and the 8 Categories of Abuse. This helped me understand that everything that happened to me was not OK, it made me realise I wasn’t crazy and that I wasn’t the problem. For me it was a massive eye opener and really helped me move on in life and start to heal from the abuse I suffered. Throughout my sessions I also used CBT Thought Records and a Gratitude Journal to help me filter out the negatives and focus on the positives.
Stop Self-hatred & Stop Self-doubt: these were my biggest challenges. I recognise my negative thoughts and turn them into positives. This has made a big difference, I don’t hate myself as much. I can self-manage with the tools that I have been given.
Help Manage Anxiety: I know how to manage my anxiety a lot more now, I’ve been able to deal with it better. I know this links to my unhelpful thinking, I no longer let the feeling consume me.
Building and Maintaining Relationships: I’m now good at realising when a relationship is unhealthy. This is a big step for me. I pay attention to the alarm bells in my head. I didn’t know to listen to myself as from a young age I was used to toxic behaviours and relationships. Relationships are about me and my daughter now. After 5 years of failed toxic relationships and a lot of hard work I am 8 months into my first happy, healthy and NON toxic relationship.
Maintaining My Boundaries: When I first started SAY Women, I was still letting others control my decisions. Now I do what's best for me and my daughter and they either like it or lump it. Everyone has their own opinions and that’s OK but I do what's right for me and my child. Growing as a woman has made the difference, I am not the scared little girl I used to be. I have boundaries and I am not afraid to cut ties with anyone who doesn’t respect that.
SAY Woman has changed my life for the better. I’m no longer the shy, timid girl that everyone can walk over. I know there is nothing wrong with me. I was abused, and I know that wasn’t right. I am a survivor, I am strong, beautiful, kind, loving and a great mum. No one will ever be able to tell me otherwise from now on! I can now have happy and healthy relationships whilst maintaining my own boundaries. I can maintain my anxiety and control my negative thoughts. But most importantly, I want to live not only for my daughter but for myself. SAY Woman saved me and helped me find myself again.
This young woman drank 1 litre of vodka a day for several years, she wanted to reduce her alcohol consumption. Through support she felt she could set herself a challenge to slowly reduce. She began using a substance diary and learning how to manage her cravings, then decided to buy 70cl each day instead of 1 litre. She is now drinking one 70cl every 3 days and is planning to reduce each week. She said having someone to report back to give her the confidence to follow through with the challenge she set for herself. She has been going out more and even went to visit a relative in England. She said she feels more confident when seeing people.
This young woman had been hiding her substance use from friends and family, which resulted in her isolating herself because she thought they wouldn’t understand. She was referred for Substance Use Support and was extremely apprehensive to start the support. She felt isolated and felt no one could understand her. We went to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting together. She said she has never felt more understood and she is not alone in this. She is still receiving support and feels she has a better understanding of why she uses drugs and alcohol.
